Adventures With an....Eccentric Neighbor

I'm just going to say it. My neighbor is crazy. I've had few encounters with her over the past few months, and I've only ever seen her sporting a pink bathrobe and slippers whilst smoking cigarettes. No matter what time of day. My first confusing interaction with her was last December, when she came outside in her "outfit" and blocked my way out of the apartment building, clearly angry with me but refusing to say anything except "don't move!" and "stay there!", while shooting me the most intense death glares I've ever received. And I've taken remotes away from kids and denied them candy the day after Halloween, so I know what I'm talking about here (I did it for good reason, don't worry). When she wouldn't tell me what the problem was I went around her and got to school. Because I had places to be. She went into her apartment and didn't come out for a few days, and when she did, she was syrupy sweet. I never did find out what made her mad. It was weird.

Flash forward to this weekend. Kristin was visiting, and after a day wandering around Perigueux, we came back to find her in a state about a small leak in her basement. She tossed out the idea of turning the water off, but said she wouldn't because the water would be cut off in my apartment as well. An hour passed, and her panic grew. She called the landlord, who is on vacation and told her to wait till Monday. She called over a neighbor, who told her it wasn't too bad and she'd have to wait till Monday to call a plumber. Unsatisfied, she called the fire department, who showed up, lights blazing. Because that's what emergency response teams are for, right? Minor household leaks. They seemed somewhat irritated that it was 9pm on a Saturday and this is what they were doing; when asked if the leak was bad, one of them answered with a curt "no.". Neither of us have the key to the utility closet, so they broke the door down and turned the water off, telling us that we could turn it on and off manually if we needed it. I showered at the gym yesterday and filled up several old wine bottles I had lying around (I knew they'd come in handy) with water for washing dishes and brushing teeth and making coffee, and it wasn't too big of a deal.

Then this afternoon, she called another guy over to mess around with it, and whatever he did turned off the water completely to my apartment. This was a problem, because I was about to take a shower. "Do you NEED to shower?" she asked. I did. So I had to shower at her apartment, which was about as creepy as I was envisioning. No fewer than 10 creepy porcelain dolls line the shelves of the bathroom. It was simultaneously hilarious and frightening. And her shower is really just a trickle so now I look like this:

Hopefully this gets resolved for good tomorrow, but this being France, I'm doubtful. In the meantime, I'll be showering at the gym, I think.


In other news, it has been in the mid 50s and sunny. Spring has SPRUNG! (I hope)

Happy Pancake Day (err... Mardi Gras)

Hi friends. I'm back on the infrequent blogging schedule. I'm still here, plugging along. I've gotten to take trips to London and Milan in the past month, but I'll get to those later. I am inspired right now to blog about the charming French people I have met, since I've had a series of good interactions with them in the past two days that compel me to want to brag about the nice people who live here. This is also significant for me and the people I complain to because this is a bit of a change in viewpoint for me, so I feel it's only fair to share the good along with the frustrating.

I will begin my story with yesterday morning. I was walking to my Monday school, which is a 45 min uphill trek, when a woman pulled over and asked me if I wanted a ride the rest of the way and nodded to the backseat, saying that her son recognized me from school. I saw the outline of a boy waving from the backseat, I couldn't tell who it was through the tinted windows. I said thanks, but I'm fine with walking. A couple of minutes later, one of the teachers from the school pulled over and told me to get in the car. It had started to rain so I thanked her and ran over. We then had the following conversation (well, I'm pretty sure this was the conversation, translated to English. I can never be too sure what I'm actually saying):

Teacher: Where do you live?
Me: Near the train station.
Teacher: What?! You're crazy. Why would you walk all that way?
Me: I don't mind, I like walking.
Teacher: You're crazy. I've never met an American who likes walking that long and uphill! I'll pick you up from now on.
Me: Oh, it's ok. Thank you, but I like walking.
Teacher: That's crazy. At least let me pick you up until the rainy season is over.
Me: Ok, that would be great. Thank you.
Teacher: How do you like Perigueux? Have you tried foie gras yet?
Me: I like it. No, I haven't tried foie gras yet (brace for the reaction)
Teacher: What?! You haven't tried it? I'll invite you over for dinner before you leave, you're not going back to the US without trying foie gras.

This conversation was particularly exciting for me because a) it proved once again that telling a native of the Dordogne that you haven't tried foie gras, their staple food, is an abomination of sorts. I'll start lying from now on. And b) this teacher was one that I didn't have the most positive interactions with for awhile at the beginning. She wasn't the initially the friendliest person I've ever met, and I've always felt a bit intimidated by her. I've heard that the French are wonderful people but sometimes a bit hard to get to know, and once they spend some time around you, they are the nicest people who would do anything to help you. This interaction is evidence of that. I now realize I shouldn't have taken what I perceived to be negative interactions quite so personally. Not that I always did, but getting a cold and unfriendly response from someone can be a little hard to take sometimes. I mean, I'm from Wisconsin. I'm used to that Midwest Nice!

I've noticed this also in the boulangerie next to my house that I go to on a nearly daily basis. The woman who works there didn't return my smiles or more than a half hearted greeting for months. Now when I walk in she gives me a big smile, asks me how my day is going, and gives me the biggest baguette she has left. It's amazing.

Third positive interaction: today, I called my landlord to tell him that the gas tank I use for cooking was empty and that I had no idea what to do about that. I was expecting what I believed to be a French response - something along the lines of "sure, I'll be there tomorrow or Thursday or something". No no. He was there within 30 minutes. And he lives 20 minutes away. When I thanked him for the quick arrival, he said "Someone who can't cook - that's an emergency! Bon appetit!" (I at least know I translated that correctly).

Speaking of my landlord, the apartment is owned by a couple who just celebrated their 80th birthdays. They live in Senegal during the winter, so I was surprised and relieved he's in the area right now. Signing my lease was the funniest and most endearing (and also, longest) lease-signing process I've ever experienced. It took an hour and a half, because his wife insisted on reading me the lease front to back three times. The third time he put his head in his hands and said "oh no.. not again! She gets it!" His wife told me never to marry a frenchman because "ils ne sont jamais contents!" - they're never happy - to which her husband responded "who would be happy when you talk so much? We've been married 60 years and you're still always talking!" I told them this seems to be a worldwide argument among couples. They laughed and then walked to their car holding hands. It was pretty cute.

That's all I have for now! Hope you're all having a great Mardi Gras/Pancake Day. Are you familiar with Pancake Day? It's being celebrated by the expats from the other countries today. I told my British friend I'd never heard of it and he thought maybe that's because every day is pancake day in America. Amen! Have a pancake today and thank my British friends for the inspiration. I sure did.